While most people in relationships still find their partners attractive, they are not in a healthy relationship. The rose-tainted glasses however maybe the reason why you never find your true love or love that you actually deserve. Here is how you can tell whether the relationship that you are in is healthy or not, so you can go out there and find happiness.
The control with kindness is probably the best place to start as this is one of the most indirect signs that your relationship is unhealthy. There is a different kind of control, other than through fear and violence, the control by partners using your weaknesses. A great partner should be able to make you happier and better minus the manipulation, regardless of the fact that your source of happiness is not them. Another sign that your relationship is unhealthy is when there is emotional blame and you the partners is technically an emotional vampire. These are the kind of people that stonewall you whenever you attempt to discuss any problem, and never empathize with the emotions that you have.
The other red flag that you should watch out for is when they are clingy and therefore need coddling, because this is actually not loved but more of a mean to manipulate you. These partners, for instance, may guilt trip you for spending time with family and friends, and this will, in turn, lead to the isolation that will then lead you to be too dependent on their company.
The unspoken standards are the other sign to watch out for. If your partner is trying to change you by trying to convince you that they know what is best, what you want and need then you should consider that an unhealthy relationship. If they express issues with their other pats relationship, then this is also a sign. Many people do not know that there is a difference between advice that is helpful, and people using the trust that you have in them to manipulate the decisions that you make.
If your partners have a short fuse, then this is a sign that you are in an unhealthy relationship. The petty and many fights may seem like nothing now, but become blow-ups later and this is something that you can avoid by talking about them like adults if you can. There is a difference between someone needing you and actually loving you, and this is where the emotional manipulation comes in. Balance of power and trust are two main pillars of a healthy relationship. If your relationship has one or more of these signs, it means that you are not in the right relationship and if this cannot be changed then you should look for better.